i just finished my first clerkship rotation in radiology. i don’t know how’s the result yet..but i hope i’ll pass. it really concerns me because i didn’t think i did well during my exams especially oral exam session. i’m a little distressed but yet i’m relieved it’s over…but not fully relieved..i’m still got a long way to go.

whenever i think about it..i have a little doubt of myself. i don’t know if i can take this anymore…it’s so tiring.. (hello it’s only radiology !!). i don’t know what will happen when i’m in a more rough departments like surgery, internal medicine or OBGYN. i might be exauhsted….even thinking about it scares the hell out of me.it made me think back about the decisions i’ve made. i don’t want to regret it..but sometimes i feel like i really do.I’m sorry for myself.

my body doesn’t feel very good now..i don’t know why. i’m easier to get sick…so much different from before.i don’t know if i’m prepared for this. i really thought i did. i could recall my resume when i applied for medicine in UNSW…i wrote ” I know my priority when I am once a medical student. I have prepared myself to accept whatever it takes whem I become a doctor”. I think i really meant it then, but i had no idea it would be this hard for me. I guess it’s because i loss my passion and found many new interests and distractions.